Et Alia

I'd like to think of myself as an individual who isn't easily triggered but recently I was proven wrong. As per usual, I'll be giving a very brief description of the scenario then going into the larger topic. I told my friend that I was happy about a new promotion I received and then I woke up the next morning to find she had sent me a meme (I can't believe I actually typed that) and I'll admit it really got to me (I really can't believe I actually typed that). The meme simply stated "when you spend years working on a study only to become et al.". Given my degree in liberal arts, one might be able to imagine why seeing that frustrated and upset me. Et al. is a Latin phrase, it's an abbreviation of the phrase et alia which means "and others". In most contexts it's just used in citations to refer to sources that essentially aren't worth mentioning fully, however, the way I took it, which is the same way that it's often seen, is as a slight. That's how it was intended in the meme, it was in reference to someone who spends so many years of their life polishing their craft only to become "others". She basically implied that I had forgotten about my dreams and resigned myself to living a life just like everyone else. Naturally that angered me, and I wanted to immediately send her back pictures of all of my notebooks and links to all my online writing as proof that even though I've taken on a job as a means of paying the bills, I have in no way forgotten my passion, but I quickly caught myself and held back. I held back for a number of reasons, the first of which being that she was just making a joke and perhaps didn't intend to upset me. The second being that doing all that would have made it very clear to her that she did get to me, and the third being that I began to suspect, perhaps she wasn't trying to upset me, but rather light a fire. Whether lighting a fire was her intention or not, the fact that I'm writing right now just goes to show that was the result, so I'm actually grateful to her in a way. The implication that you've given up, that you've become "et al." is hurtful and can be discouraging, but only if you allow yourself to take it that way. I've made the choice not to take it that way. I've made the choice to use my frustration as fuel to work on my craft and refocus on my long term goals. I'm doing that precisely because of what she sent me, because I don't want to be just another face in the crowd. I spent far too much time and effort on my degree to just allow my craft to sit on the shelf and gather dust. Writing, like any other skill, requires constant practice in order to be maintained, and this most recent experience was a prominent reminder of that. I actually told her that I didn't need such a reminder (admittedly out of irritation) but now I'm starting to think that perhaps I did need a reminder such as that. Perhaps I have become complacent with being "et al." For the love of God, I wrote a whole entry not too long ago about just that. However, in my lotus eater entry, I reminded myself that I'm not just sitting around allowing my passions to fall by the wayside and I should remind myself of that as well here. Simply the fact that I'm writing right now is a testament to that. While I don't believe that I'm "et al." and I truly don't think I ever will be, I would say that a reminder of that possibility isn't the worst thing in the world. It did inspire me to write and for that, I am grateful to my friend.