Pedophilia

Disturbing subject matter certainly isn't something I've been afraid to discuss, and that's due to a critical aspect of my philosophy which is that we need to talk about these things if we really want to achieve solutions. I felt that was necessary to reiterate before getting into this one. Pedophilia is definitely about as disturbing as topics get. Sex is a powerful thing, but it can be both beautiful and it can be disgusting. This is one of the realms in which it is truly bastardized due to the nature and circumstance of the act. Sexuality covers a wide spectrum, no one can deny that, but there are practices that are acceptable, and there are those that are not. This is precisely one that isn't. In my eyes, the key factor that determines whether a sexual tendency is appropriate and healthy or not is consent. Consent is something that can only be given by an adult who is fully aware of what is going on. If the act is between an adult and a child, it is very clear that one of the parties is not fully aware or in control of what is going on and that makes it wrong in every possible sense. The laws of society reflect this, but unfortunately only for the most part. In general, American society views the age of consent as 18, however from my understanding this isn't the law in every single state, and in many parts of the world the legal age is much lower. This is incredibly unsettling to me for two reasons: the first is that it means that some lawmakers around the world believe that people who, for all intensive purposes are children, can make those decisions for themselves, and the second is that in general it means there are so many individuals out there who don't naturally know what kind of relationship is improper that there needs to be laws dictating it for them. I'm not saying there shouldn't be an age of consent, since it's clear that it's necessary, in fact, personally I think it should be higher but I accept that it's not my call to make. Taking a step back, I'll reiterate what I mean when I said "knowing what kind of a relationship is improper". I can't speak for anyone else, but I can speak for myself, and ever since I began having romantic interest in women, it's always been women around my own age, maybe slightly younger, or in the case of my last relationship a fair bit older. I've heard of high school guys becoming involved with friends of their younger brothers or sisters, and the thought of that always made me uncomfortable. The reason it unsettled me is because I always thought of my younger sisters friends as girls, as kids, as individuals that I wanted nothing to do with romantically. I could be friends with them, but anything more than that was odd in my mind. The friends of my younger brother (who is much younger) were out of the question entirely, since I saw them as basically babies. Obviously not everyone sees things that way, and those individuals who take it to an extreme are known as pedophiles. The definition of a pedophile is a person who is sexually attracted to children. The exact perimeters for what is considered pedophilia is for the person with the psychiatric disorder to be at least 16 years old and for them to be at least five years older than the prepubescent child that they're attracted to. Obviously whenever most people think of pedophilia they imagine an old man trying to lure children into his van, but it's much broader than that. Pedophilia isn't just some old creep, it's a 21 year old whose "girlfriend" is 16, it's an attractive female teacher who is behaving inappropriately with one of her students, and it can also be family. None of those cases are any less disgusting and revolting than the idea of a creepy old man trying to snatch up children from a playground, and the fact that they are often more tolerated than the aforementioned is a substantial societal failure in my eyes. The vast majority of people understand what kind of sexual behavior is inappropriate, this is why those that either don't or do and just commit the acts anyway are categorized as having a psychiatric disorder. I'm sure that most people, myself included, remember watching low quality videos warning of the danger of pedophiles, usually titled something like "stranger danger", and if you're like me, you may still remember those videos to this day. The most vivid memory I have about those videos is one in which the scenario that occurred was that of a family friend purposefully spilling paint on kids clothes so he could ask them to take them off and take pictures of them to "commemorate the day they spilled the paint" (I know it's very disgusting, but that's exactly the point the video was trying to make). Just the fact that I remember that scene to this day should tell you how effective the film was. It stuck with me, and from then on I was constantly wary of adults around me. The illusion that all adults could be trusted was efficiently shattered after seeing all of that. Thankfully nothing ever happened to me, but not everyone is so lucky, which is why it is so important for EVERYONE to be on the look out for suspicious or inappropriate activity if they see it and make sure every possible measure is taken to prevent any minors from coming to harm. This includes calling out your "friend" who says "age is just a number". This includes refraining from making the joke about how hooking up with a teacher probably made a high school student more popular, and it absolutely includes taking action no matter what your relationship to the individual behaving improperly may be. The damage pedophilia does to children is unforgivable. It fundamentally changes them and the trauma that occurs therein stays with them throughout their lives. Victims of sexual abuse often struggle throughout life to establish healthy sexual relationships, they often struggle with trusting anyone, and they often struggle with having a healthy sense of self worth all because of something that may have only happened once. The reason one time is all it takes is because that act sends a powerful message, the damage of which takes immeasurable time and effort to undo. That message is that the victim is powerless, that they are worthless, and that they don't deserve to be treated with dignity. If you don't see a problem with inflicting that on a human being, you have a mental disorder. There is no arguing, this is not up for debate, it is a fact.