Disciplining Children

I can't say that I have had any experience in child rearing but I can speak from my own upbringing and from what I've seen in others. I didn't get into a whole lot of trouble growing up. I was a fairly well behaved child who rarely required discipline and on the rare occasions that I did, my parents never dealt out physical punishment. They would raise their voices from time to time and give out punishments in accordance with what I'd done but at the core of all the discipline that they did give me was the focus on making me understand what I did wrong, why it was wrong, and to help me learn from it. I'd like to think that I'm a fairly well adjusted adult and I would attribute a large part of that to the disciplinary style my mother and step father employed. I have a good amount of friends that have kids now and I always find it interesting to see the different styles in which they employ discipline. I had one somewhat awkward incident when a friend of mine had to discipline his son in front of me. The child was throwing a tantrum because my friend had told him he had to put the video game he was playing down and get ready for bed. My friend raised his voice at the child and took a hold of him in order to get the child's attention. Although it was a little physical, it was far from child abuse in my opinion. Once my friend did that, his son calmed down and did as he was told. Obviously the discipline worked, as somewhat unpleasant as it was to see, the child did as he was told. On the other hand, I've seen parents who passively let their children do whatever they want and I think this makes for some very poorly adjusted adults that those children will grow up to be. If and when I decide to have kids of my own, I want to employ a disciplinary style similar to that that my parents implemented for my siblings and I. One thing I am definitely not for, is physical discipline. I think causing harm to a child who has done something wrong, first of all, doesn't teach them anything. It just teaches them to fear repercussions instead of having an understanding of why they are in the wrong and to learn from it. Above all, I think discipline should be educational. So if and when I decide to have children of my own, and obviously only then will I understand what disciplinary action is really all about, I hope that I will be able to employ discipline that helps my children grow from the experience. I will never spank my child, but I don't see anything wrong with raising your voice in order to get their attention. Discipline should be educational first and foremost.