Masculinity

To me, masculinity isn't simply about being big and strong. It isn't about being the toughest person or the vicinity, being a provider, or being a typical alpha male. Yes all those things are a part of it, but in my eyes they aren't the most important part. Personally, the times when I feel most like a man are when I'm either making good on my word, or taking responsibility for my mistakes. To me, being a man is being responsible. The old saying "a man is only as good as his word" rings very true to me. A man is straightforward and clear about what he wants and needs, and he makes good on his promises. I'll admit that the rush of testosterone that I get when putting in hard work, whether it be working outside, doing something with my hands, or simply just putting in work at the gym feels good, but I know that all that's going on there is just a rush of hormones. Being a man is so much more than just chemicals pumping through your body. Anybody can put in physical work, but acting on and living by a set of firmly held principles is what really makes a man in my opinion. We all know that there are certain traits that society deems necessary for masculinity; strength, power, machismo and the like. While I don't think those are necessarily bad things in and of themselves, they carry a negative stigma when you look at things from the other angle. Showing emotions is thought to be unbecoming of a man, which is something I think is really damaging to boys in the world. We're taught that it's a sign of weakness to be in touch with our emotions. We're taught that we're not supposed to express ourselves and I think this is particularly damaging because it teaches us to repress how we feel, to bury our feelings, which we all know is never a healthy thing to do. I think us men should be able to show our emotions but I also think that a big part of masculinity is having the fortitude to know when doing so is appropriate. Sometimes a situation requires stoicism, but that's not to say that most of the time it should be acceptable for a man to express how he feels. Like I said before, I think that personal responsibility is the most important aspect of masculinity. I think that we as a society need to ditch some of the more archaic aspects of what we think makes a man, but still hold onto the aspects that are important not just for men, but for adults in general; Personal responsibility, honesty, integrity, and fortitude.