Romance

With valentines day coming up, its been on my mind, which is why I'm writing on this subject. I'll admit that I haven't had that many relationships in my life, but there have been a few women I've known that have had a profound impact and influence on me. It always shocks me how quickly romantic feelings can come on and more often than not, when they hit, they hit pretty hard. There is an upside and a downside of developing feelings for someone. The upside is that those feelings become a source of genuine happiness when they're reciprocated, but the downside is that there is a strong possibility of becoming dependent on that person and being let down that much more if and when things deteriorate. Despite the possibility, and often times probability, that things won't work out, the feeling of knowing that there is someone out there who thinks that you deserve to be happy makes it all worth it in my opinion. Usually when I start to develop feelings for a woman, those feelings start out as an admiration. I've always been attracted to ambitious women who are deeply involved in their own lives and have a sense of direction. It's my understanding of what I'm attracted to that's helped me to realize why my last experience didn't work out. The girl I had been talking to made it very clear that she was interested in a romantic relationship but she also had admitted to me that she had always been in one relationship or another ever since she was eighteen and that she didn't really know what to do with herself now that she was single. It was that knowledge of how dependent on others she was for happiness that made me realize that I just flat out wasn't attracted to her. I wasn't sad that it didn't work out because I knew it would be a waste of both of our time and that we'd just be keeping each other from finding what we really want. Romance is complicated, that much I know for sure. Nothing is cut and dry and there is definitely a lot of work that needs to be put in if you want to keep it up..Things fell apart with my last girlfriend because I simply didn't put in the work, but I don't beat myself up about it too much because she found someone else that's able to give her the attention that I couldn't. I know it's a cliché saying but it rings true when I say that I'm just happy that she's happy. As of recently there is a woman that I think I'm starting to become attracted to but I think it's a good idea to not be in any rush. I think that if something is meant to come of the feelings that are starting to form, it will unfold naturally and shouldn't be forced. Over all, I think the most important thing to be before you invest in a relationship is involved in your own life and secure with yourself as an individual, otherwise I think an unhealthy dependency is bound to develop. Romance is weird but it's deeply enjoyable and can be very fulfilling which is why the benefits are worth the risk of putting yourself out there. I'm not in any hurry to find someone because I know that if it's meant to be, it will happen naturally and the only thing I can do at the moment is focus on my own life and better myself so that if and when it does happen, I know I'll be ready.